Time to myself...

Sometimes I just need some time to myself. Last night Ry had baseball practice and while I was sitting there reading my book ( yet another Jodi Picoult book )I had this overwhelming urge that I needed to get the hell out of there and be by myself. There was no reason for it, but I just needed to get away. Ry was practicing, Rae was running around and I really just needed some peace and quiet. Once Chris got there I quickly packed up my stuff and headed to the gym. I already had my work-out clothes with me so I quickly changed and hit the machines.

There is something about being in the zone, feeling sweat drip down your body and letting all the thoughts of the day go with each step on the elliptical. As I focus on the words of the book I am reading I find myself engrossed in another world, in someone elses life and for a little bit, I escape. ( not that I am escaping from anything bad, but we all need a break every now and then ). As my heart beats faster and faster I put the book down and deal with the emotions and bullshit of the day. Sometimes it is processing happiness, other times it is processing stress. Whatever the case may be for some reason the gym is like therapy for me. Especially when I go alone. As I make my way over to the recumbant bike ( because my knee is throbbing, thank you drill-team...ugh) I sit down and start pedaling as fast as my legs will go. My legs are burning and with each cycle I want to stop, but I know I have to keep going and going. That is the way life is you know? Sometimes you want it to stop for a few minutes so you can catch your breath, but we all know that isn't possible. I close my eyes and start processing all my thoughts. I sort out the things that need done at work, home, etc... I plan out a make-shift schedule of the week so I am not frantically trying to get the kids from here to there and so that I can try to get a grip on my scatterbrainedness. ( is that a word? ) When my time is up on the bike I stop and slowly stand up. My legs are shaking and room is slightly spinning. I love this feeling. Why? I don't know, but I have always loved that feeling of having everything drained from me. I take a drink of water and head over to the machines/weights. I work on my problem area...my legs... ack, it is not as easy to get my legs skinny as it was in highschool, damn getting old is hard sometimes. I climb onto one of the machines and as I am doing leg presses my muscles feel like they are on fire. My legs begin shaking and again I close my eyes and put my head back and enjoy the burn. Eventually I am done with my work-out. I feel like a new person. I am ready to go home and leave behind anything that was bothering me, stressing me out, or embrace the thing that is making me happy.

When I got home last night the kids were fed, showered and already in bed. Chris did good. It was a good night. No, not that I don't want to see my kids at night, but I feed them, give them a shower, and put them to bed the majority of the time so having a night off was nice. I wasn't totally off the hook though. At 1 in the morning Rae came to my room. I was exhausted and couldn't even have the middle of the night battle with her. Therefore, she won and got to sleep with me. Yep, I was weak last night !!!

Anyway, so that was my night last night. I will probably go back to the gym tonight. It is Wednesday and I don't have much else going on. The kids can play in the kid area while I do a rinse and repeat of last night. This gym membership is much cheaper than therapy I tell you !!

In depth...

Okay, so I am finally at work and I am able give you a few updates about the weekend.
First off, I apologize that I kept saying Memorial Day. Yes,I know it was Labor Day, but please remember that I have two children and I forget what day of the week it is most of the time. I am lucky to remember Christmas !!!

So, yesterday was fun. We went over to my sister's house to swim and my niece Jenna had a friend over playing. Her name is Lindsey ( the friend, not my niece ). Lindsey is 6 and Ryan thought she was soooo pretty. The funny thing is that Lindsey has a crush on Ry as well. As sweet as I thought this was,it kind of freaked me out. I mean, I knew that there would be a day where Ry would start liking Jenna's friends. I just didn't know it would be at 6 yrs old. We were eating dinner at my parents and Ry was very adamant that Lindsey sit by him. Awwwwwww !!!!!

Then we went to see baby Emma. I thought Rae would be all excited about it, but do you know who was the most inquisitive??? Ryan !!! He told me that he wanted a little brother... Sorry kiddo, not gonna happen !!!!! The LAST thing that I need is a baby. Baby Emma is gorgeous and sweet and I didn't want to give her back !!!

I finally got a new card reader so I was able to upload all the pictures. I figured I would put the big ones on my blog, but all you really have to do is click on the picture and you can see the big version on it, so I am not going to waste my time!!

Today I am back at work. Rain is in the forecast, which is quite depressing. Rae is suuposed to have soccer practice today, however I wouldn't be surprised if it got rained out. What doesn't get rained out these days?????

Labor Day...

It was a great day !!!
I have lots and lots of pictures to share!!!

I can't access my photobucket account right now, so I am going to have to upload them in blogger for now. I will put big pics up tomorrow. This is for now !!!

These first ones are when we first got to my sister's house. It was in front on her barn.







These next ones are of the kids swimming. The adults were drinking wine !! LOL













This next set is from my parent's house. The kids were all playing on the tire swing and having a blast.







These last one's are baby Emma !!! Gretch had her on Wednesday. Isn't she beautiful???? She is soooo sweet. I didn't want to put her down.







Okay, hope you enjoy all the pics !! I will blog in the morning about the events of the day, but for now, here are the pics !!

It wasn't that bad...

Splashtown that is... I was dreading going. It is always crowded and the lines are always too long. That wasn't the case today. We got there at 10:00 ( when it opened ) and did all the water slides first. Rae is finally tall enough to ride most of them. My little dare devil loved them !! She went down so many times. The lifeguards freaked out a few times b/c she was small, but she held on and stayed in the tube each time. Ry and Rae loved the wave pool. I managed to work on the tan some and I even rode some rides. Overall, we had a really good time. I am trying to relax so that I can start cleaning the house soon. Blech !! I want to get it over with tonight though.

Not much else to say. I hope everyone had as great of day as I did and that they were able to enjoy their family as well !!

It hurts...

my head that is. It is 7;30 on a Saturday morning and I can't sleep. I am hungover and sitting here with a headache. I am supposed to take the kids to splashtown today, now that one is going to be fun !!! ( can you sense the sarcasm? ) I had fun last night, but feel like crap today because of it. Mom, don't lecture me on drinking okay?

Anyway, I am sitting here in a quiet household. The kids are still asleep and I am sitting in the recliner updating the blog. I have a lot going on this weekend so I will update when I can. I am hoping to get some new pics of the kids this weekend. I am not taking my camera to splashtown, so it won't be from there LOL Maybe if I get the house clean tonight I will take them to do some pics tomorrow morning before our little get together. I need to get Rae's hair trimmed, but don't want a pair of scissors to go near her. Her hair is finally getting long again !!!

Okay, so my early morning ramblings are over. Before I end this I am going to post some quotes that I have found over the years and these are just the ones I have found about life so to speak. I have TONS of ones about families and kids, but that can be another post !!

"Sometimes our light goes out but is blown into flame by another human being. Each of us owes deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this light."
-Albert Schweitzer

"You don't marry someone you can live with - you marry the person who you cannot live without."
-unknown

"Within you I lose myself
Without you I find myself
Wanting to be lost again."
-Unknown

The only way to have a friend is to be one.
* Ralph Waldo Emerson

The first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: Decide what you want.
Ben Stein

Who would have thunk it???

Okay,so I have been putting PRESCRIPTION drops in my eyes ever since they got irritated on Wednesday. My eyes have not been getting better. They still been dry, red and throbbing. So,I ask one of my co-workers if she has any regular eye drops. She had run of the mill Visine. So, I use it and gues what????? My eyes are back to normal !! So,I go to Walgreens to pick some up during lunch and I asked the pharmacist about that. She asked me if I had sensitive eyes...yup !! She said I was probably allergic to the prescription eyes drops. So, I have been making my eyes MORE irritated by using them. This is SOOOOO my luck. Anyway,I am happy that my eyes are now back to a normal color. I can probably even put my contacts back in my eyes tonight. woo hoo !! Who would have thunk it??

That sweet smile....

Sometimes a smile can do wonders.

Last nigh the kids fell asleep in the car on the way home. I put them to bed without a bath knowing that I would have to get them up early and have them take a shower today.

This morning I had to be at work early, so I had to drag the kids out of bed around 5:30. They were troopers to say the very least. Rae said that her eyes weren't working, so I told her to get in the shower and I would wash her hair for her. I told her the warm water would help wake her up. So, I give her a shower and she gets out and says,
"Thank you Mommy, my eyes are working now, you made it all better" and she gave me that sweet smile. I helped her get dressed and put a pony tail in her hair. " I look like Mommy today", then that sweet smile again.
You know, I was dreading today. Work has been rough this week, but that little girl's smile makes me realize that everything is going to be okay. I know that no matter what happens today that she will have that smile waiting for me. Before I left the house I gave her a hug and a kiss and once again I looked down to see that sweet smile. Children are amazing. God is good.

This is the "sweet smile" that melts my heart every time !!

All Girls Team????

So, I just got an email from the coach of Reagan's soccer team. It is an all girls team !!! OMG, what is she going to do? If you think I am joking, I am not. Reagan LOVES to play with little boys and it is pretty much the only thing she knows. There are a few little girls that she plays with at school and when friends come over, but for the most part it is boys. So, yes, Rae is starting soccer this year. It is going to be interesting. The girl LOVES to run. She is almost as fast as her brother. She certainly did not pick up the speed from me !! LOL Ummm, mom, no comments from you on this one please. Ry is playing soccer as well. That one is going to be hard to juggle with baseball, but we will do it.

My late sleeping Saturdays are now gone again. I will now be at the soccer fields at 8:00 a.m. on Saturday morning with my cup of starbucks and back up Diet Coke. I do not like the sport of soccer, but sign the kids up because they want to. Personally it bores the hell out of me and all I get out of it is socialization. I hope they do not expect make-up or hair in anything but a pony-tail. It is not going to happen.

Oh, funny thing...okay so you know how I have said that a lot of parents work for Miller Lite? Okay, well last year one of the parents got ahold of black ski hats that had "Miller Lite " on them. Well, I think 4 or 5 of our little guys wore them during soccer !! It was hilarious to see a field of 4 boys with black ski hats,and then you get up close and they were all walking billboards for Miller Lite. I promise we really are good parents.

Son of a sailor...

I love that Jimmy Buffet song. One of Chris's best friends is a Jimmy Buffet freak and I remember Nick always playing Jimmy Buffet whenever we would go to shoot pool. Ahhhhh, those were some fun days. That summer was so much fun. I saw my best friend almost every day ( cause she dated Nick for a little bit) and we did so much together. I miss you Christi !!!

Anyway, so I just had to post about that b/c it is on my computer's playlist and as I was opening my blog it started to play. Isn't it odd how different songs remind you of different people?

Okay, so here are some of my songs that I have on my playlist that bring back memories of old friends.

Lucky ( by Seven Mary Three)- I had never heard this song until college. I used to drive back my friend Eric Mees sometimes on the weekends and one day he made me listen to this song....I was HOOKED !!!! It has been one of my favorite songs ever since and I think it might even be on Ashley's top 10 list too.

Piano Man ( Billy Joel )- This is 100% me and Ashley's song. I am not sure how we figured out that we both loved this song, but we did and it has been "ours" ever since !!

Tiny Dancer ( Elton John)- I don't know why but this song reminds me of Rae. Maybe it is how I imagine her to be as a grown woman. I am not sure, but she is my little tiny dancer. ( well except for the "lay me down in sheets of linen" line LOL )

I Am The Greatest ( Kenny Rogers)- I made a DVD video about 2 yrs ago for Ryan's baseball team and I used this song. Ever since it has ALWAYS reminded me of him. I love it !!

Silent All These Years- ( Tori Amos) - This reminds me of my old college roommate. We used to drive around Nacagdoches and listen to that song. We thought we were bad ass girls !! Just kidding !!!

Everything That Glitters Is Not Gold ( Dan Seals)- This reminds me of my childhood and of driving in the car with my mom. That was ALWAYS "my" song. I can't remember a time in my life when I didn't know that song.

I don't think I can add audio files to this blog...I will try to figure it out though!!

Anyway, so my eye is irritated and all red again. Work ROYALLY pissed me off yesterday and made me cry. I HATE to cry and when I do, everything and anything that I am feeling comes pouring out. I bawled for like an hour, however I did get taken out to lunch by the DBC ( Dakota Blue Crew) so that I could feel better.
Anyway, I had my contacts in yesterday and by the end of the day that eye was all irritated again. I put my glasses on once I got home and now I have to wear them for at least 2-3 days. BOO !!!!

When I picked up Rae yesterday from school I was told she had a REALLY bad day. She was crying that she was hungry. Her teacher told me that she barely eats at school. That doesn't surprise me. She is a VERY picky eater and when she does eat she eats like a bird. She is just fine only having 2 meals a day. I hope today is better for her.

Ry is liking his teacher I guess...he hasn't told me much.

Teresa and I went to the gym last night. My legs are SOOOOOO sore today. It is funny, when T and I are at the gym I think we believe that no one can hear our conversations. LOL Oh my, half the stuff we talk about could make a grown man blush, so I am sure the sweet little lady behind us on the treadmills was getting an ear full !! LOL After we worked out we got in the hot tub and chatted for awhile. That hot water felt SOOOOO nice and I think I would be in even more pain today if I hadn't done that.

Anyway, that is what is going on right now. I will try to work on getting some audio files of my favorite songs on here !!

I need a drink...

or something. Okay, so I get to work to get all of these checks ready and guess what???? The money wasn't transferred... ummm, okay, so I am not answering ANY phone calls today !! I am done. I am sooo tired of putting these people off day in and day out. Soooo, instead of a drink I think I will go hit the gym again after work. What sucks is that I finished the book I was reading last night. ( the book I have been reading at the gym ) That means that the time on the elliptical is REALLY going to be long and boring. Maybe I should skip the work out and go straight to the hot tub today. Too bad that doesn't burn calories.

So, Labor Day is coming up and I am having a party at the house. It should be fun, however that means I will be cleaning Saturday after I get home from Splashtown. Yes, you heard it right I am taking the kids to Splashtown. I really don't like the place. I think it has gone downhill, but the kids like it. We haven't taken them yet this year and we have free tickets. I am going with Stephen and Theresa. I am sure Ry is going to make me stand in all those long lines and go down all those rides. I am sorry, but after going to Schlitterbaun in New Braunsfels, Splashtown doesn't compare !!! I would rather float the lazy river all day and get a tan, but I don't see Ry and Rae being okay with that.

Okay, a few people have emailed me asking when I would be posting new pictures. Ummmm, when I get a new card reader and when I have the time. It has been so hot lately that they would be all sweaty in the pictures. However, it is supposed to rain in the next few days and I REALLY want to get some pictures of the kids playing in the rain. I just need to get my camera covered and protected for that. I have so many ideas for photoshoots, but I just need the time to do them. I promise some will be coming soon.

Can I go back to sleep....

It is 5:45 and I am already at work. I have soooo much to do today. I was complaining of being bored yesterday and today, well my deadline is 8 a.m to make about 50 vendors happy. So, I crawled out of bed at 4:45 so that I accomplish this. I should have stopped at Starbucks or gotten a Red Bull somewhere. I hope my co-workers don't come in to find me passed out asleep on my desk. Please let today be over with soon.

On another note, I had a HUGE scare yesterday !! So, at 3:15 yesterday my work decided to give me all the info for our new accounts etc and expected me to cut ALL needed vendor checks by 4:00. I laughed at them. So, I started scrambling to start this rushed process and my phone rings. It was Ryan's school.

School- "We have Ryan here in the front office. He was supposed to be picked up by 3:15"

Me- "UMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM, ( this was an aggrevated, worried, and scared UMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM) he was SUPPOSED to be picked up by Kids R Kids !!!! "

School- "That is what Ryan told us but Kids R Kids said they didn't have him on their list"

I start to panic at this point.

Me- "I am an hour away !!!!!"

School- " Do you have anyone that can pick him up?"

Me- "I don't know.... I will figure something out and call you right back"

I call Kids R Kids and give them a good lashing about not getting Ryan, etc...etc... They say I didn't sign the release and paperwork. At this point I am embarrased b/c unfortunately I am VERY scatterbrained and I had dropped the ball.

Kids R Kids- "We will go get Ryan right now"

Okay, so problem solved. Anyway, I get to Kids R Kids that afternoon and guess what???????? When we opened Ryan's file I HAD signed the release and everything !! They were apologetic and Ryan was fine. However, that kind of stuff happens to me ALL THE TIME !!!!

Ry enjoyed his first day and didn't get in trouble !! ( I am trying to look on the bright and positive side of things this year !! )

So, we were supposed to have baseball practice, but it got rained out. I was looking forward to it. Practice always means the kids get worn out. Mother Nature had other plans. The sky opened up and poured buckets of rain an hour before practice. CRAP !! The good thing about that is that I was able to go to the gym a little early. Theresa met me there and once again proceeded to kick my ass. ( sorry for the language guys, but you know me !! ) Seriously, the girl wanted to go to a body and soul class after we had already been working out for 45 minutes !! You crazy girl????? Oh and I think they need to make a special gym just for 15-21 yr olds. I think Lifetime Fitness is their new social hang out spot. They were EVERYWHERE !!! They can however leave the hotties to work out... gotta love some good eye candy while you are trying not to act like a wimp and only lift 20 lbs ( my poor arms are sooo weak !! ). I am waiting for the pain from last night to set in. Thanks T for the workout and I will see you Wednesday night. Hey, remember your suit so that we can hit the hot tub afterwards !!!!!

I finished my book ( if you haven't you need to read The Pact by Jodi Picoult... very good book !! ) tonight and crashed. 5 hours later here I am at work. Being a grown-up sucks sometimes. Why can't I be a 15 yr old again who hangs out at Lifetime Fitness with the hotties.... a girl can dream can't she???

oh oh oh...one more thing.... I have 3 new favorite websites. Warning: theres adult subject matter. No, not any pictures, but just some of the stuff people say. I never knew some moms were SOOOOOO miserable. Makes me thankful for the life I do have.

www.truemomconfessions.com
www.truedadconfessions.com
www.trueofficeconfesstions.com

The dad one can get raunchy, but hilarious !!!

First Day of School...

Ry starts first grade today. I took him on Friday to meet the teacher. AWWWWWWW !!! He is growing up so fast. He was soooo excited for today. This comes as a shock to me b/c at the end of the school year last year he told me he was never going back. A Kindergarten drop out....what fun !! I am glad he changed his mind and has decided to continue his education. I am really tired of reading the screens on the x-box games and gameboy. I took him to get his haircut yesterday. It is back in full on military style. I don't know why I keep it so short, but I can't stand the scruffy look. Oh this brings me back to the M.A.S.K. days !! Okay, some of you know what I am talking about...others do not. Please let me take a minute to explain. When Ry and Rae were little I was known for keeping them extremely well groomed and cleaned. I FREAKED out at Ry's first b-day b/c he got orange frosting all over him. I truly hated for them to be dirty. Anyway, not only did I not like for my kids to look scruffy, but it bothered me when other kids looked scruffy. I mean come on moms, how long does it take to wash their face, clean the boogies out of their nose and brush their hair? Anyway, so I always said I was the founding member of M.A.S.K.- Mother's Against Scruffy Kids. As the years have gone on I have gotten lax and I truly think that if I had more than 2 kids that I would probably get booted from M.A.S.K. Rae seems to have taken every step possible to get me banned. I fix her hair and 10 minutes later she has the pony tail pulled out and she has a string of hair in her mouth !! EWWWWW !!!

So, back to the first day of school. I had to get Ry a new lunchbox yesterday. His old one is floating around Kids R Kids right now and who knows if I will ever see it again. He picked out a lunch box that looked like it would fit 4 lunches in it. I had to explain to him that he was 6, not 16. So, I broke his poor little heart and made him get a different one. I am SUCH A MEAN MOMMY !!! I also got him a new backpack. Okay....no flames.....we got him a New York Yankees sling back pack. The kid loves the Yankees for some reason. I still haven't figured it out. His favorite baseball teams are the Yankees, Cubs, Astros, and the Indians ( just b/c it has a smiling indian as the mascot !! LOL ).


I will update you and let you know how it goes. Last year Ryan had an issue w/ keeping his mouth shut and staying on task in class. Part of me is afraid that he got his Daddy's ADD, but I think society medicates children too fast. That is the easy way out. If Ryan did have ADD, it would only be slight from what I have seen and I think kids CAN fully function through that. When I was a kid only a small small handful of kids had ADD. There was only one who I remember who really needed his meds... MARK !!!!!

Whoa, I am getting off topic left and right here. Not sure what topic I was really on. We have baseball practice tonight which means he practices until close to 8:30, then has to go home, get a shower and go to bed. ( I feed him before practice folks !! ) His teacher will LOVE him tomorrow. Oh, so you know how I was sooo excited to get lots of sleep this weekend? Yeah well, last night not so much. I was ALMOST asleep, then I heard it... BEEP.... 1 minute later BEEP. Why in the hell do smoke detector batteries ALWAYS go out b/w the hours of midnight and 3 a.m.? So, I had to get up around 1 and change the battery. Two hours later I fell asleep. Two hours later I was awake for work. Sucks huh?

Okay, I have rambled enough and who knows if you actually got through this whole post !!!

Oh, T I need some more medicine !!! I am in pain right now girlie...guess I will run out to Walgreens.

So far so good...

This morning we all slept in. Okay, wel I slept in until 9:00. My kids were up at 8:00, but turned on the t.v., got a snack and Ry proceeded to Heely around the house while Rae got her eyes to work. ( this can be a long process for Rae) Anyway, bless their souls, the kids let me sleep in !!! Get this....I fell asleep around 11:30 last night and got to sleep until 9:00....did you get that??? 9.5 hrs of blessed sleep !! That is usually what I get in two nights combined. Today is going to be a good day, I can tell. The kids are watching poke'mon ( I think that is what this whacked out show is )It is 9:20 and we are supposed to start cleaning at 9:30. I think we can knock this out in about 2 hrs or so. Then I have to clean out my hell whole of a Nissan that manages to collect a closet worth of the kids clothes, 4 pairs of shoes and who knows how many empty juice boxes every week. Once that mission has been accomplished I think I am going to take the kids swimming. It is a GORGEOUS day and I need to darken the tan !!

For now I am waiting for my Diet coke to kick in so that I can start my morning of cleaning. We all know that Diet Coke is essential in getting me going every morning !!

2 more days until school starts....

I CANNOT wait for Ry to go back to school. How I long for those days when he is so mentally and physically exhausted that he cannot question every decision I make as a mother !!

Ryan: Can we go over to John's house...
Me: Ummmm, NO
Ryan: Why?
Me: Because we aren't going anywhere tonight.
Ryan: Why?
Me: Because we need a night at home to rest.
Ryan: Why?
Me: Because we have to get up in the morning and clean house.
Ryan: WWWWWWWWWWHHHHHYYYYYYYYY???? ( this would be a long drawn out whining why)
Me: Because we clean every saturday morning Ryan ( or at least we try tee hee )
Ryan: Okay, can Cameron come over to play?
Me: No
Ryan: WWWWWHHHHYYYYYY?

I am going to erase the word why out of his vocabulary !!

He asks WHY about everything??? It is like he has regressed to being two again !!

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!